Apostrofee

apostrofee \ə-ˈpäs-trə-fi\
noun.

A penalty that must be paid for the misu'se of the holy punctuation mark. Depending on the company one keep's, this may vary from a kick in the genitalia, to permanent banishment from any possible written social interaction in the future.

Note: There isn't really a law about this as of now, but the lobbyists are getting stronger.
Subliminal Message: Join us.

Astroknot

astroknot \ˈas-trə-ˌnȯt\
noun.

1. a match made in heaven
2. a marriage, which, if not fueled enough, may come crashing down


NOTE:
The two almost contradictory meanings have been known to have caused more than one rifts. The fact that the word also has a homophone, hasn't helped. Humorous situations are left as an exercise for the reader